Today, I'm Dr. Jekyll

So here's the Jekyll and Hyde of it all...

I've been of two minds lately: one side of me says "go, go, go" with the self-publishing. The cold hard fact is that people are really making money...some of them good money...publishing directly to the Kindle. How long will this last? No one knows, but "infinite growth" is impossible; history is filled with examples. So Mr. Hyde (he's the ugly one) wants to jump in (er, cash in) while he can.

But is he really the ugly one?

Dr. Jekyll is the half who wants to keep "improving my craft" and strives for professional membership in the HWA and/or the SFWA. He's the one who made me hammer away at my little stories until landing that (cue hautboys) Shimmer acceptance. But wait...wasn't it Jekyll who gave birth to Hyde in the first place? Isn't Hyde just another side of his personality?

What does Jekyll really want? Awards? Accolades? Acceptance from the cool kids who get to play "professional writer"? Are those things really any different than cashing in on the Kindle craze? Damn it, Jekyll! You made this monster, now man up and do something about him!

*deep breath* Okay. Call it "growing pains". What do I do next? Can I find a way to sate both sides of my writerly self?

Today, I'm Dr. Jekyll. I need to put final edits on a short story. I like the story; I've worked hard on the story. Should the target market accept it, I think I'll make something like $30, minus Paypal fees. Hopefully a hundred people will read it. Mr. Hyde is laughing at me, just like he did all last week while I toiled away at my 2677 edits for The Saints are Dead.

*sigh*

The Big Experiment: Jekyll and Hyde

I've been feeling a little like a man split in two lately. More soon...

Thanks, dear readers for all the feedback on the cover. Have a fabulous weekend.

We are the Monsters Draft Cover

Thoughts?

WIP Wednesday is Jealous

Oh, Sisyphus, how I feel for thee.

I'm on comment #1138 out of #2677 from an editor's pass on a book. None of the edits were changes to the text...oh no...they were just comments. 2677, people! Thank Zeus for digital files. If I had to do all of this on paper, I'd shoot myself. I just might, anyway, and then come back to haunt the editor in question.

So my WIP is jealous because I'm putting it on hold until I scratch through the rest of this ridiculous pile of comments. Thank goodness I've managed to send out my eighth Write 1/Sub 1 entry.

The Thing About Books

An old high school buddy sent an email the other day. He'd just read Loathsome, Dark and Deep and told me "[I'm] Still reading two to three books a week and just wanted to tell you how impressed I was by yours."

This guy used to read about a book a day. No shit. He'd read all day at school, and then, in the evening, tell me everything he read. A true speed-reader. We haven't seen each other in years, part of the tragedy of adulthood, but used to hang every day. A note like that means more than a professional review.

Speaking of Loathsome, I went to the Lawrence Public Library last night to pick up a copy of Roald Dahl's Dirty Beasts for a forensics kid, and found Loathsome, Dark and Deep on the "new fiction" shelf. Pretty cool. Now someone please check it out so it doesn't have to sit there and let all the bigger books bully it.

Speaking of books, I'm running a Goodreads giveaway for The House Eaters. I've noticed The House Eaters has landed on a number of "to be read" shelves, more than my other books, so there must be something to this giveaway thing. Will all of those translate into sales or even reads? I don't know...but it is worth noting. If you're interested, you can sign up below:

Goodreads Book Giveaway

The House Eaters

by Aaron Polson

Giveaway ends February 28, 2011.

See the giveaway details
at Goodreads.

Enter to win

Speaking of books (man, I need a new transition), I've arranged my first book signing. More soon.

Enjoy Tuesday.

Goodbye, Dear Friend

It pains me to report (although most of you have doubtless read), Necrotic Tissue will be closing its doors with issue #14.

Necrotic Tissue was my first HWA qualifying sale back when they paid $25 to make sure newbies could squeeze their toes through the "affiliate" door. I've been lucky enough to have three stories appear in Necrotic Tissue over the years: "Catalog Sales", "The Distillery", and the recent flash story, "Enough", in issue #13.


It's sad to see such cornerstones of the small press fade. Sadder still had it not been with us at all.

Thank you, Mr. McCoy and staff, for all the horror you've brought us.

Write 1 / Sub 1 Weekend Update

Always a bridesmaid...

We had two forensics (speech and drama) meets this week, and my squad scored second at both.

2nd!

I'm happy, of course, but we could have won both. We lost by a mere 5 points on Saturday (163-158). Granted, there were 14 teams so 2nd is pretty good.

What does this have to do with writing? Not much, only to explain I didn't spend much time writing. I did manage to finish edits on "Lullaby" a 2,500 word fantasy piece which I sent, appropriately, to Fantasy for quick rejection. It has since joined the ranks of slush piles everywhere.

Maybe I can get something done tonight...maybe.

Happy writing, folks.

Friday Art Show: Tiger, Tiger...

(Jungle Cats, Owen Polson, age 7)

"The Tiger"

by William Blake (1757–1827)

TIGER, tiger, burning bright
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

In what distant deeps or skies
Burnt the fire of thine eyes?
On what wings dare he aspire?
What the hand dare seize the fire?

And what shoulder and what art
Could twist the sinews of thy heart?
And when thy heart began to beat,
What dread hand and what dread feet?

What the hammer? what the chain?
In what furnace was thy brain?
What the anvil? What dread grasp
Dare its deadly terrors clasp?

When the stars threw down their spears,
And water'd heaven with their tears,
Did He smile His work to see?
Did He who made the lamb make thee?

Tiger, tiger, burning bright
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?

Hello, Goodbye

Thanks to everyone who read, commented, and/or rated "Soul Marbles". I appreciated all of it: the good, the bad, the ugly, and in between. Every Day Fiction is a perfect example of the power of online markets. The story garnered 20+ comments and 40+ ratings--you and I know there were many more readers. So, thanks.

Hello to Barry Napier's Masks of Our Fathers, which should be available for purchase on Kindle soon (it's already listed on Amazon). I read Masks in beta, and it's a great ride. Day Terrors, including my short story "Sea of Green, Sea of Gold", is also up for purchase in dead-tree format.

Finally, I must say goodbye to our local Borders store. As part of the bankrupcy, Borders will close 200 stores, including the Lawrence branch. Sorry I didn't buy more books...well...not really. We have a great, thriving indie store, The Raven, just down the street. If I'm going to support a brick and mortar, it'll be the indies.

Have a lovely Thursday. And no, we didn't win yesterday. We took second of ten.

"Soul Marbles" at Every Day Fiction

You can read my journeyman story, "Soul Marbles", at Every Day Fiction today. I use the word journeyman because a few top-notch flash markets have held it for "final review" and then rejected it in the end. I'm glad it finally has a home.

Is it speculative? I'll leave that for you to decide (and you will have to decide). As always, I appreciate the read, the rating, and any comments, good or bad, you choose to make.

I'm off to our "league" forensics meet today. It would be nice to bring home the banner...

Ain't Taking Shorts No More (Writing for Free)

NPR's Morning Edition ran a piece this morning titled "Is Writing Online Without Pay Worth It?"

Listen to it. (Or at least read the summary) Then read David Carr's original article at the NY Times, "At Media Companies, a Nation of Serfs".

Yes, they're talking, in general, about non-fiction (sort of...I guess). Hell, just commenting on an article online is offering content for free. Some irony there, considering some of the comments on Carr's article. According to Carr, your Twitter feed and Facebook profile are forms of writing for free. Yikes... Facebook has learned how to cash in. Twitter isn't there. Yet.

Look--this isn't new. I occasionally listen to sports talk radio. I know, it might seem a little "out of character" for me, but it is entertaining. And you know what? The callers provide much of the content (and they are weirdos). No, it isn't a new phenomenon at all.

But is it scary? Yes, especially to anyone who wishes to write for money. Is there a corollary to fiction? Hell yes. I read a good deal of fiction online for free. Yes, many of the markets are well-paying (Apex*, Clarkesworld, Fantasy, etc.), but I'm not buying copies of Fantasy and Science Fiction or Asimov's when I'm spending my limited reading time with Redstone SF or Lightspeed online for free. I currently have subscriptions to Shimmer, Space & Time, and Necrotic Tissue. I try to spend a little money on small press every month (books, etc.), but the writing, I think, is on the virtual wall.

Will I stop blogging? No. Will I stop commenting on others' blogs, tweeting, or any of the other content-creating exercises? No. Am I going to throw an old-school Harlan Ellison rant about paying me? No.


Not yet.

And writing fiction? I'll quit when I'm dead. (but hopefully not from starvation)

*okay, so I did sign on for the Apex subscription, but I could read it for free.

Happy Valentine's Day Podcast

Matt Cowens has created a nifty little podcast of "Better Lessons" for Every Day Fiction.

Give it a listen, if you like. It's sort of a love story. I guess.

And this heart's for you (happy Valentine's Day):

Write 1 / Sub 1 Weekend Update #write1sub1

A week of flash fiction. Whew.

I subbed "A Long Walk to Never" (a riff on Kurt Vonnegut's "A Long Walk to Forever") to Abyss & Apex. Yes, it's a piece of flash fiction.

My first acceptance for a Write 1 / Sub 1 piece came last week: "The Ballad of Arkady and Nadia" will appear in 100 Stories for Queensland. I don't generally sub to non-paying markets anymore*, but I always will for a good cause. I did land two more acceptances this week (funny how these things come in clumps and then nothing for a month or more). "Poe's Blender" (an extension of a Friday Flash I wrote long ago) sold to Death Rattle and "Upon Leaving the Candy Factory" (a weird little thing with candy-making zombies) sold to Bourbon Penn. Both stories were nearing the end of their "lives", so whew.

One final piece of flash news, and then I'm off...three stories of mine have made the cut for The Best of Every Day Fiction 3: "Billy Boy", "How to Burn a House", and "Faith". I'm quite honored to find a place in the volume (TOC mates include Gay Degani, Robert Swartwood, Milo James Fowler, and many more excellent writers). A big thanks to Jordan Lapp and Camille Gooderham Campbell and the rest of the team at EDF for their hard work and finding something in my little stories.

All right...(rolls up sleeves)...I have some editing to do. Happy writing.

*In genre fiction (horror, fantasy, science fiction), there is a quality gap between most non-paying venues and those which pay at least token or semi-pro rates. The markets become more competitive, too, and competition makes us all better (even though it is frustrating at times).

Friday Freak Out: Suspiria

Why did it take me so long to see this movie? Suspiria is the closest thing to a nightmare on screen I've ever experienced.

Have a great weekend.

WIP Wednesday is Fraught with Absurdity

We have another snow day. Eight this year. I'm going a little batty, to tell the truth.

So I spent a good deal of my morning editing Borrowed Saints. This afternoon, I'll have another look at Anthony J. Rapino's Uprooted, the next chapbook for Strange Publications.

If you find yourself snowed in and need something to read (or just need something to read), might I steer you toward Jeremy Kelley's "This is Nathan Hall" (a serial short at his blog).

Innsmouth Free Press #6 is up and running, too, featuring several lovely pieces of weird fiction by writers such as Angela Slatter, Joshua M. Reynolds, Daniel José Older, and yours truly with "Drowning Old Milford". As always, it is a free read, and you can download the PDF issue for free, too.


Have a lovely day. No more snow, okay?

21st Century Digital Boy

Yesterday I was amped for a rant (of sorts). Actually, it was more of an airing of my dirty laundry, past mistakes and present failures...

Once upon a time I was a writer who doubted myself too much. Note the phrase "too much". Any good writer should doubt a portion of his/her work because, let's be honest, no one does it right every time. No one writes a perfect story on the first draft. No one. (Although Harlan Ellison has come close...check out "Flop Sweat"...he wrote it in one day to be read on air that night. Chilling as today's temperature: 3 degrees Fahrenheit--I won't even convert to Celsius...yow.)

I still doubt myself. But I've moved on. Sort of.

And I'm thankful for the 21st century. I'm thankful for the ability to do certain things* for myself in the future. I'm thankful a 21st century storyteller can reach out and find an audience, even a small audience, without having to prostate himself to the whims of the big meat grinder.

I'd rather have a small, honest audience than a huge audience to which I lie so somebody else can reap the benefits. Don't know what I'm talking about? For the latest example, read: "E-Book Royalty Math: The House Always Wins" (thanks for the link to Robert Swartwood)

Look, no publisher which intends to stay in business can have only an author's best interests in mind. Publishers are in business to make money, and there are plenty of want-to-be writers lined up waiting to take an author's place if that author doesn't pay the bills. Didn't make a profit for the publisher? Next...next...next...

I've had dealings with three small presses--Belfire Press, Virtual Tales, and Aqueous Press. Jodi Lee and company at Belfire have been great. I have certain reservations about the author agreements I've signed with the other two, although Virtual Tales has been top-notch with artwork, promotion, and other "intangibles". Certain things remain to be seen with Aqueous. I'm not excited at all with recent developments (which have nothing to do with my book) because of the "guilt by association" factor involved. Again, I'll refer you to Mr. Swartwood for the scoop. One thing I appreciate about Robert is his unflinching honesty. I'm too much of a chicken-shit most of the time.

So why did I sign on? Once upon a time I was a writer who doubted myself too much. Doubt leads to fear. Fear leads to decisions founded in sand.

I've come to the conclusion that an author's best interests are handled best by that author unless you are a machine (e.g., Stephen King, John Grisham, etc.). An agent can be great in looking out for an author's interests but only as far as it serves the agent (i.e., makes the agent money). No, it's not sour grapes; it's business, and I don't fault any agent for seeking only those clients which will make him/her the most money. That is an agent's job. Many have kids to feed.** But I haven't bothered to query an agent in almost two years. It just doesn't seem like the right time for me.

So for me, small time author, right now it's best to do what I can for myself. The 21st century has laid the tools in my lap.*

At least, this way, when mistakes are made, they're all mine.***

One final note: thanks to everyone who has purchased, promoted, or talked about 52 Stitches. Jamie was family, and it does my sometimes bitter and jaded heart good to see the power of my extended internet family.

*cover art, e-publishing, promotion, etc.
**I do. Let me tell you, having a family changes perspective on a lot of things.
***Selfish much?

Walking On

Okay, I know sports metaphors are overdone...and I don't usually use them. I have a (sort of) personal connection to this one.

The Green Bay Packers won the Super Bowl. Yeah, yeah huzzah for them and all that. The story I want to tell is about one of their receivers, Jordy Nelson, a kid (and yes, even though he now holds the Green Bay postseason record for yards in a postseason game, I can still call a guy ten years younger than me "kid") who grew up about fifteen miles from my hometown.

Long before Nelson grabbed nine passes and scored a touchdown in the Super Bowl, before the Packers chose him in the second round of the draft, before he set Kansas State records as a senior, he was a walk-on for that Wildcat team as a freshman. And before that, he was "just" a Kansas farm kid.

He saw something he wanted and went for it.

Now he's a world champion.

Does everyone achieve what they "go for"? No. Of course not.

But the only way to guarantee failure is by not trying at all.

I don't even need to explain the correlation with writing, do I?

(Tim Fox/The Dallas Morning News)

Write 1 / Sub 1 Weekend Update #write1sub1

Well, I managed to get a piece of flash out into the ether this week, a short little thing titled "Why Susie McTavish Believes in Angels". I'm not sure it works, but it gave me shivers when I wrote it. We shall see...

I'm doing okay on the writing side of things but falling behind on editing and revising. I will not send a story out before it's ready. So, I have three longish tales (3K or more) written and waiting for editing/revision and another flash story in the queue. I suppose I should hammer them into shape before writing another word.

Speaking of hammers, one features as an important prop in The House Eaters, my YA horror book (which adults should dig, too) which was released this week. How's that for a segue?

If you're interested in a signed copy, drop me a line (aaron.polson@gmail.com). I'm selling them at cover price + shipping, so no gouging here. Maybe I should offer a discount...(haha)

We're All Winners

Once Upon a Time...I was an art student. Have you seen Google Art Project? Wow. Zoom in on van Gogh's The Starry Night. Amazing.

The winner of my Loathsome Reviews Contest is Mary Rajotte. Drop me a line, Mary, and claim your cash money prize. (It was another Canadian...someone will cry "foul")

Take the little poll thingy (upper right-hand corner) to help me choose where to donate January's $5.

And, don't you like it when advertisers go out of their way to be weird?


No, I will not taste the rainbow, but a dude in a giant tube sock is pretty cool.

WIP Wednesday Gets Out of the Way

Because The House Eaters is now available in paperback. I'm excited, of course, because I love this story and its sarcastic, wise-cracking narrator, Nick Gillingham.

Nick Gillingham knew that moving before his senior year would really suck... but he never imagined a nightmare like Broughton’s Hollow. It’s bad enough that Nick hears disembodied voices after moving near “the House”—a crumbling relic with a sinister past. But then the local football team decides to make him their new tackling dummy, the “hot babe” at school starts manipulating him for her own nefarious purposes, and his parents’ marriage falls apart. When Nick’s elderly neighbor hints that whatever lurks within “the House” might be the cause of his troubles, he sets out to uncover the truth behind the local Indian legend of the “Eating Monster.” Nick will to have to rely on a band of social outcasts from school—and his looney kid sister—to put his life and family back together again. But even if he survives a close encounter with “the House,” Nick will still need to find a date for the homecoming dance...

So yeah, to sum up: excited. You can purchase a copy at Amazon.com or signed copies through me (just send an email to aaron.polson@gmail.com). Ebook edition to follow soon...

Snowpocalypse Now

Seriously, I should be teaching, but mother nature has dumped a massive (like from New Mexico to Michigan) sized storm of the U.S.

Speaking of teaching, one of the skills I've learned as a teacher is how to transition between topics. Try this:

Snowpocalypse Now is a cheeky reference to the movie Apocalypse Now which is based on Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness which is the template for my book, Loathsome, Dark, and Deep.

Whew.

Well check out this nice review of Loathsome, Dark, and Deep at Hellnotes:

It’s a cleverly thought out survival novel that turns into a “search for a man who can answer our questions” novel, with Henry taken prisoner by a fellow named Curt who can explain the presence of the zombie-like “Ruined Men.”

Now that's nice. Click above to read the rest (should you want to, of course). Daniel Powell, author of An Autumn Harvest, had some nice things to say, too. Thanks for reading.

This transition isn't as smooth.

I've come to the end of my first "month of experimentation" with Kindle publishing, and, well, have (drum roll please) seven sales! Yes, seven copies of The Bottom Feeders sold in January, and, I'm surprisingly excited about it. Why? Because everybody I know already bought copies before January (I think)--that means seven "strangers" gave it a go. So my "profit" total for 2011...

7 books x $.35 a book = $2.45!

Now, I know I said I was going to donate 10% to a charity each month...I am. At least. 25 cents doesn't seem like much of a donation, does it? So each month I make less than $10 (could be the whole year, folks), I'm going to donate at least $5.

So who should the $5 go to this month? I'm taking suggestions and then will hold a poll.

I'll announce the winner of the review contest tomorrow...stay tuned. We're likely snowed in for a few days...