Wednesday, December 28, 2011

WIP Wednesday: Long Live Serial Fiction

I'm writing about zombies.

Well, not exactly. I'm writing about people dealing with zombies and each other in a post-apocalyptic setting. I (almost) swore I never would, but, as Justin Bieber says, never say never.

Great Zeus, did I just reference Bieber?

I'll be releasing Dead Lands in three parts. If I still want to play in the world I've created, I have ideas for other books. 

Come back Friday for a the first chapter of the first installment, Pass the Ammunition. Until then, here's a teaser:


Back in high school, Mrs. Phelps made us do this little writing project about what kind of junk we’d grab if our house was on fire. She was an English teacher and older than both my folks put together. Even her wrinkles had wrinkles, but you won’t see anyone that old anymore. They can’t run fast enough. They can’t swing a bat or sledge hammer hard enough to crack a zombie’s skull. Most kids wrote down inane shit like family photos or their Chihuahua. I think I wrote about my brother’s Playboy collection. That was a different life.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Shimmer 14

A pleasant, non-healthcare related distraction... Whew. I need one of those.

Shimmer #14 has been released to the wild, including:

Food My Father Feeds Me, Love My Husband Shows Me, by A. A. Balaskovits

Chinvat, by Sunny Moraine

Made of Mud, by Ari Goelman

This House was Never a Castle, by Aaron Polson

Minnow, by Carlea Holl-Jensen

Trashman, by A.C. Wise

We Make Tea, by Meryl Ferguson

Bad Moon Risen, by Eric Del Carlo

Some Letters for Ove Lindström, by Karin Tidbeck

Gödel Apparition Fugue, by Craig DeLancey

You can read Eric Del Carlo's piece, "Bad Moon Risen," free online. But I know you want a copy, don't you?


Well, don't you?

Monday, December 26, 2011

My Three Sons

First of all, Max is (somewhat) on the mend. Thanks for all the well wishes and positive vibes; I told him he had good vibrations sailing in from around the globe. He smiled. His condition (which involves some rather unpleasant blood where there should be no blood) continues to stymie the doctors, but we did escape the hospital in time for Christmas at home. His spirits are high and energy better than it has been, so I have hope.

With the infant at our house (Elliot continues to be the most chilled-out baby I've ever met), we didn't have to travel this year. Christmas at home was soooooo pleasant.

Owen is winning the best big-brother award this year. The hug Max delivered upon opening Owen's gift was a once in a lifetime moment. Evidently, Lego Hero Factory kits = "I love you to the moon and back, man" in Max's world. 

I'll start on something writing related soon, but for now I'm just circling the nest.

It's a good place to be.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Living in a Castle

Max is sick.

I sent a brief tweet last night, but he's at Children's Mercy Hospital in Kansas City. I'm his roommate for the stay, and we are lucky enough to be in the "castle tower". Funny, from the outside of the building it just looked like a hospital.

The accomidations are... passable.

He appreciates all the positive vibes.

Friday, December 16, 2011

His Name is (Elliot) Robert Polson

And no, I'm not making (too much of) an allusion to Fight Club.


Elliot Robert Polson with big brother Max. 

Elliot was born at 9:03 PM on 12/15/2011 after a crazy day of induced labor, nerve pinching, and cheerleading. The big fella weighed in at 9 lbs, 2 oz and was a neat 21 1/2 inches long.

He's getting reading to join his brothers' club some day.


(Yes, I know Polson and Paulson are spelled differently... Thank you very much.)

Welcome to this wacky family, Elliot!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

The Editing Ninja: An Abusive A


Does any word misuse cause more consternation than the simple flipping of articles a and an? The rule is simple: a comes before words beginning with a consonant or consonant sound; an comes before words beginning with a vowel or vowel sound.

Incorrect: Dakota ate a orange. 

Correct: Dakota ate an orange.

Incorrect: Gregory became an zombie.

Correct: Gregory became a zombie.

Poor Gregory. 

Some notes:

The vowel u often makes a consonant sound (yew) at the beginning of words such as university and unified. Therefore, a must proceed these words even though they start with a vowel.

Be aware of words which begin with silent letters, such as the h in herb or heir. Since the initial sound is a vowel, you must use an.

The sound wins every time. Yet another reason you should read your work aloud in the revision phase. 


Wednesday, December 14, 2011

WIP Wednesday: The Waiting Game

Aimee's due date was last Sunday (12/11/11).  So we are waiting.

And waiting.

And the longer we wait, the closer baby's birthday will be to Christmas, for which he/she will never forgive his/her parents (at least during the teen years).

In the mean time, I'm writing about zombies, but doing so on my terms:


Had I known I’d be shot in the back, I might have stayed in my bunk.


(Here's a dirty little secret: editors of small press mags might shy away from zombies, but the e-reading public sure doesn't.)

Booooks, booooks, booooks...

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Bigotry in America

On the way to school this morning, I heard a story about Lowes (the home improvement store) and the television series, All-American Muslim. You can listen to the story (about three minutes) here.

I've never watched All-American Muslim. I hadn't even heard of the show. I've shopped at Lowes before, but doubt I will again.

Evidently, "the conservative group that got Lowe's to pull its ads from a reality TV show about American Muslims has been fighting for more than two decades against gay rights, strip clubs and most anything else that offends evangelical Christians."

Well, Mr. David Caton of the "Florida Family Association," you offend me. You offend me with your hatred, bigotry and misinformation.

Several politicians called the Florida Family Association a fringe hate group, a title Caton shrugged off, saying the group aims to "defend traditional American biblical values."

Traditional American biblical values? What, like burning witches and lynchings?

Caton suggests "99.9 percent of Muslims agree with the principles of Sharia law" and by nature, Islam requires a follower to be an extremist.

You wouldn't know anything about extremism, would you Mr. Caton?

Take a gander at the truth about Muslims in America. Of course, it's all to easy for haters to ignore the truth, isn't it? Haters have been ignoring the truth for a long, long time. 

I love the country in which I was raised, a place in which different people have the right to be different--even if it requires struggle to gain and maintain that right.

The struggle is our greatest strength; the struggle keeps us honest.

I'm not sure where Mr. Caton lives, but it's not my America. If I had any advertising dollars, I'd call TLC right now and ask for an ad spot.

Monday, December 12, 2011

Joe R. Lansdale, Master Storyteller

I haven't stayed up late to finish a book in a few years. Having children cuts down one's desire to be groggy the next day. They're always on, and a parent isn't really allowed a day off.

Joe R. Lansdale weaves stories I would cringe to write (and give my left pinkie, to boot).  The cringe comes from his subject matter--he doesn't shy away from awful race relations, lynchings, and rape.  But damn, can this man write. My Saturday night became Sunday morning, but I had to finish The Bottoms.

The Bottoms (2000) is beautiful and thrilling, and a fine companion for an older audience looking for a read in the vein of To Kill a Mockingbird.The subject matter is challenging, but realistic, and man... Mr. Lansdale keeps the pages turning.




Sunday, December 11, 2011

Dreadfully Yours

Introducing the Abominable Gentlemen:






And by "Abominable" I mean "Awesome".



Penny Dreadnought, an ongoing digital pulp, is published by and features stories from the Abominable Gentlemen:
 
and me
 In this first issue, Introducing Penny Dreadnought, Insidious Indoctrination Engine of the Abominable Gentlemen, we put forth some of our best stories. Later issues will have various, dark themes and feature new material.

Exciting?  

Dreadfully so. 

And a steal at $0.99:

Amazon (US)
Amazon (UK)

Friday, December 9, 2011

Fleecing the Flock

There has been much ado about nothing regarding Amazon's new KDP select program. Some authors/publishers/etc. have cried foul, saying Amazon's practices are tantamount to a monopoly.

Pu-lease. They're asking for a minimum of 90 days exclusivity for a few promotional benefits. Don't like it? Don't sign up. I don't know that I've ever signed a short story contract for less than 90 days exclusivity, and several of those were for token-paying markets.

But--and here's the fleecing--Kindle Nation Daily is offering a "Free Book Highlighing" Service to "Help Indie Authors Get the Word Out About New Free Book Listings!"

You see, KDP will now allow an author to list his/her book for free for up to five days within the 90 day period. For the low (cough, cough) cost of $25.99 a day, Kindle Nation Daily will highlight the book for you.  Go on. Read the fine print. 

I know how I feel about this. Your thoughts?

Thursday, December 8, 2011

The Editing Ninja: Whose versus Who's


The apostrophe causes problems with these two homophones.
  
Whose is a possessive pronoun.

Incorrect: Who’s car is this?

Correct: Whose car is this?

Who’s is the contraction of who and is. Again, the apostrophe (like with it’s) indicates the omission of a letter.

Incorrect: Whose on first using who’s glove?

Correct: Who’s on first using whose glove?

Simple, right?  And now you can steal from the Editing Ninja's arsenal in one handy digital package:

(Isn't he cute?)

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Temper Tantrums

Temper tantrums... Who said they were limited to children. Read the comments on any contraversial blog, and you'll quickly see my point.

With the impending birth of our third child, this NPR story about tantrums really caught my attention.

The most important lesson: when a child is angry, do nothing.

This works for internet trolls, too. Don't respond to the negative comments, and magic happens.

Food for thought.




Sunday, December 4, 2011

Sample Sunday: From Vengeful Spirits

From Chapter 6 of Vengeful Spirits (now discounted at Amazon and Smashwords):

“Thank you,” Phoebe said to the librarian. The floor cried out and the old man shifted in his chair as she turned to the foyer and heavy set of stairs which led to the second floor. To her surprise, the wide staircase didn’t make a sound as she climbed. The rail, darkly stained wood, was cold and smooth in her hand. She rounded the landing, and saw the second floor was dark.
It’s just a library.
She lowered her head and forced legs up the final steps. A small, handwritten sign read “please turn off lights as you leave” with a switch beneath it. Phoebe happily flicked the switch, and the room sparked to life. The floor plan mimicked the level below, with racks of books visible inside a room labeled “Non-fiction” to her left and another room labeled “Reference” to the right. She moved toward the right, surprised at the eerie silence of the carpeted floors. So silent she imagined even the books were listening for the slightest sound, waiting to fall from the shelves and crush her.
Tall windows decorated the walls of the reference room, and Phoebe quickly found the shelves of bound newspapers. They were large books, as wide and tall as the paper and at least three or four inches thick. Five volumes all together, each marked with dates on the spine.
“Okay, Phoebe, where to start,” she whispered to herself. She pulled out the volume with 1918-1935 on the spine, deciding to start with the train. If what her brother said was true, she’d need a paper from 1928. The heavy book echoed in the empty room as she dropped it on the table top. Inside, the pages were obvious reproductions made on glossy, heavyweight paper.
The first headline, Doughboys Stop Hun in Belleau Wood, showed pictures of four local men in uniform along with a map of France. Phoebe’s fingers slid over the slick pages, turning them gently, one at a time. Some jumped weeks, others only days. The paper must have been published on an irregular schedule. She passed Armistice Day, various business announcements in the early twenties, election results, and finally, on April 30, 1928, the headline she’d been looking for:
Tragedy Strikes on Rail: 78 Confirmed Dead
The reproduction, like most of the other pages, was of poor quality. Many of the words were nearly unreadable because of smudges or age. Phoebe was able to decode enough to learn the train wrecked just west of town while crossing a steel deck girder bridge over the Republic River. The engine had skipped the tracks traveling at approximately 35 miles per hour, and dragged all cars and passengers over the edge.
Subsequent pages showed grainy, black and white photos of the rescue efforts. The final death toll for the tragedy stopped at eighty-one.
A sigh escaped Phoebe’s lips, long and raspy like a midnight breeze. She hadn’t realized she’d been holding her breath until so much of it came at once. Eighty-one people died in a train wreck outside a small town in Kansas. Two parents die on an icy road in Illinois. Phoebe’s blood became frozen mud. She closed her eyes, and tried to remember her mother’s face.
She couldn’t.
A noise sounded across the second floor—a thump, the sound of a book falling from a shelf onto the carpeted floor. Phoebe pressed her fingers against the tabletop until the blood drained away and they were as white and cold as new snow.
“Hello?”
The building answered with a quiet, settling creak. Outside, the sun had begun to set, and the room, with its bright fluorescent lights, was now brighter than the sky. How long had she been in there?
She returned the 1918-1935 book to the shelf, and drew out 1936-1948. Another heavy volume, this one largely filled with the last years of the Great Depression and World War II. Nothing about a school fire.
It was a picture in the next volume, 1949-1965, which caused the icy fingers of terror to encircle Phoebe’s heart—not the picture exactly, but the caption beneath. The photo was of a young woman, Lucy Hardaway, fifteen. The caption read:
The Strangler Takes Another Victim
Phoebe covered her mouth and stifled a gasp. She scanned the date under the newspaper flag: September 21, 1957. Another victim? Her fingers worked the pages in reverse order, checking each until 1955. She found nothing about a first victim. Maybe an accident. An omission. Maybe the police hadn’t known or the paper didn’t report it—
Another sound from across the way.
Phoebe felt for her bag under the table. She thought of calling EG, telling him to come pick her up, now. She would run down the stairs, leaving the 1949-1965 book open on the table, open to the picture of Lucy Hardaway, a pretty girl in black and white with dark curls, glasses, and thick eyebrows. She could…
No.
She turned past Lucy’s picture, hunting for another mention of the Strangler. A morbid curiosity took over Phoebe’s fingers. She flipped the next few pages, working against the fear which clutched her heart and threatened to crush her lungs. Cars passed on the street below, making strange shapes on the walls with their headlights. She flinched at every, tiny sound.
January 4, 1958. Another girl, Joan Carpenter, dead of the Strangler, only now, the reporters had begun to call him—of course they assumed he was male—the Springdale Strangler. There was mention of another girl in the article, evidently the first victim, a young woman who lived in the rural area surrounding town. Evelyn Jones died six months before poor Lucy, but the police only made the connection after the second death.
With fevered intensity, Phoebe continued her hunt. The police searched for the Strangler. He’d gone silent until 1961. The girl’s name was Emma Lee. She had dark hair, limp and long, her face was long, too. High cheekbones. Phoebe couldn’t help but think she’d seen the face before, somewhere. She went missing in June of ’61, and the police feared the worst. The FBI became involved.
She flipped pages, skipping anything which didn’t mention the Strangler.
July 1, 1961, the FBI and Spring County Sheriff’s Department cornered a man named Nathaniel Slade in a small house on the heights overlooking the Republican River. After an eight hour standoff, the law enforcement moved in, shooting Slade dead. He was unarmed.
They never found Emma’s body. 

Grab a copy for Kindle or other e-reading devices for only $0.99 and find out what happened to poor Emma. 

Saturday, December 3, 2011

We have a Winner! (and More Elective Surgery)

Fred, the envelope please...

Mary Rajotte is the winner of my 50/50 split of In the Memory House profits for November, thus continuing a fine tradition of Canadians winning my contests. Congrats, Mary. I'll be in touch to share the bounty.

Which might (or might not, who knows?) have been a bigger bounty had I started with this:


Instead of In the Memory House. Sometimes I need a little more market research. I tend to be too much of a gut guy. You see, In the Memory House is also the title of Howard Mansfield's book of essays about New England culture and history.

Yeah. Not my book at all. Mine features a living house which tries to make friends by killing people. Think of it as a house with Asperger's on steroids.

So maybe Echoes of the Dead has a little more zip. The word "Dead" lands hard, at least. It does deliver the message directly, and I've found that is a key piece of marketing any book. And yes, the paperback is still coming.

And then I've nixed Smoke and replaced it with Vengeful Spirits. Again, I think the new title lands harder and sends a little more of a direct message about the book's content.  I've also tweaked the cover with new font and image:



This poor puppy has been through a number of changes, originally starting as Borrowed Saints. Like I said, I'm a gut guy. My heart and mind need to arm wrestle before the next book skitters into the wild.

Congrats again, Mary.  And good luck, my dear books.  I will try to do you better in the future.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

The Editing Ninja Assassinates Myself

Okay, the pronoun myself is used and abused far too much.

Myself is NEVER used to replace I or me. Got it? It should only be used reflexively (I stabbed myself) or for emphasis (I told Mr. Polson myself).

Wrong: Myself and my son will go to the game on Saturday.

Right: My son and I will go to the game on Saturday.*

Wrong: She emailed Juan and myself.

Right: She emailed Juan and me.

*You should always mention yourself last. It pays to be humble.